I Can't Get Him Out Of My Mind!
The chili cook-off was a lot of fun, and that was mostly because I felt welcomed by a new friend, Zach. The cook-off was on Saturday night, and Guy returned back from his weekend trip on Sunday night. Of course, after a few days apart from one another, we were thankful to be around each other again, and the relationship continued.
Christmas break could not come fast enough that year. I was exhausted from pledging, studying, and for some reason I was more homesick my sophomore year than my freshman year. On top of that, I had some serious thinking to do about my relationship with Guy. I just felt like things were good. Not great. Just good. As mentioned in Part 1, my roommate, ‘B’, and I grew up together. Over Christmas break I was at her house just hanging out with her family. We were talking with her mom about different things that happened that semester, and for some reason, I had a surge of energy and started talking about this guy that I had met at a devotional. It had been 2 months since I had even seen him, but I just couldn’t get him out of my mind! I would think of him at random times and wonder what he was doing for his Christmas break. I even remember waking up on Christmas morning and being compelled to call him! I came very close to looking his number up in the phone book, but then I realized how crazy that would make me seem. Here I was- a 19 year old sophomore in college trying to contact a 25 year old man who owned his own business and hadn’t seen me in 2 months! Not to mention, I had been in a relationship with Guy for 8 months, and I wouldn’t want him calling some older lady! I honestly thought that I would never see Zach again, so I just talked myself out of my crazy, hopeful thoughts.
As Christmas break came to an end, I realized that Guy and I needed to break up- for good. Not because of this Zach person, but for many other reasons. The time apart from Guy helped me clear my mind and grow confident in my decision. It still took me one week into the Spring semester to officially break up with him, but it finally happened. It wasn’t a horrible break up, but it was still hard. I remember talking to B in our room after the break up. I remember telling her how strange it was that I felt such a peace about everything. I was calm, confident, and relieved about my decision. It was a Sunday night, and I just felt like going out and doing something I wouldn’t normally do. So I called up a friend (a male-friend) who I always enjoyed being around (completely platonic) but never got to hang out with because I was dating someone. I went over to his house and we just hung out watching TV with his roommates. A little into the night, he said he needed to go across the street because his neighbors always had friends over on Sunday nights. He said that I should come, and I was very excited to say yes…after all, his neighbors were the same people who had the chili cook off. Who knows…maybe Zach would be home!??
As we made our way across the street, I could see the house was full of people. I immediately got nervous because all these people were going to be upperclassmen, but I was still ‘high’ from the break-up and felt good about meeting new people. As we walked into the house, my eyes searched the room for any people that I might know. That was when my stomach dropped. Sitting on a couch, facing me, looking straight at me was Guy. It was at that point that I felt like scum’a-tha-earth! After all, these were his friends-his safe place to unwind after a break up- and the last thing he needed was his ex walking in with a smile on her face with a different guy. It took me about .5 seconds to turn around and walk back outside. It was then that my stomach dropped again. Standing right there was Zach. In the middle of feeling like the worst person in the world, I immediately felt relieved to see him and his kind face. I nervously tried to make small talk, and fortunately, the friend who walked me over there knew Zach really well and they started talking about their weekend. I sat and listened to my friend tell Zach about his weekend, and then the conversation got interesting when my friend asked Zach how his date went on Friday night. I have to admit that I was a little bummed to hear that he could be dating someone, but Zach made it very clear that the date was not to be repeated again. I didn’t want to hang around too long since my newly-ex-boyfriend was 5 feet away inside the house, so I headed home after the short conversation with Zach. I was exhausted when I got back to the dorm, so I got ready for bed earlier than usual. I sat in bed that night and thought about the events of the day.
Break up with Guy- check
Not fall apart after break up- check
Tell girlfriends we broke up- check
Feel like scum’a-tha-earth- check
Have another good run-in with Zach- check
Not fall apart after break up- check
Tell girlfriends we broke up- check
Feel like scum’a-tha-earth- check
Have another good run-in with Zach- check
I couldn’t explain the peace I felt at the time, but it was amazing. For the first time I had stood up for myself and made a major decision that only I could make! I felt good. Really good. I slept hard that night, and woke up the next morning feeling rejuvenated and fresh. Normally Mondays are my least favorite day of the week, but that Monday was different. It was a cool day with not a cloud in sight. Everything that day fell into place for me. Ya know…it was just one of those kind of days. As the evening approached, I was in my dorm room starting to study for my Micro Biology class. I sat on my bed and started to open my books and notebook on my lap, and that was when the phone rang.
Hello…
Hi, is Kara there?
This is she.
Hey, it’s Zach. This might sound kind of weird, but I was going to see if you could meet me in the amphitheater in 10 minutes.
Umm…s-sure. I’ll see you there in a little bit.
I hung up the phone and couldn’t hold back a huge smile.
TBC.
